just a line..

love you or hate you,
miss you or forget you,
wait for you or just move on.
it's only a step to each side.

but i'm stuck in the middle line,
no idea which side to cross.

goodbye forever.

the last time we met was like years ago.
we were still laughing and joking away.

i know i could count on you.
when i'm down,you will be there.
when i got my heartbreak,
you were there to see me cry and console me.

but i wasn't there when you needed someone.

we lost contact,
and we never saw each other again.

until,i received a call,
and i know you were gone.

you left without a word,
you left without a sound.

you left us in your sleep.
just like this.

i wanted to see you again,
but it's too late.

i regret for what ive done all these years.
i'm not a good friend,but you gave me the best you can.

friend,i'll miss you.
and so do others.

you might be with god now,
and i'm sure he will take good care of you.

if there's a next life,
lets be brothers again.
and this time round,
i will not repeat the same mistake.

rest in peace bro.i'll miss you and will never forget you.

it's time to party!

cooling night,
blowing wind.

it's party time!

dance to the music.
and let yourself loose.

get your clothes off,
and come in my bed.

sorry

girl,i'm sorry..


the night is alright.
the walk home is fine.

i piggyback you all the way home.
halfway through,
i feel your tears on my shoulder.

you ask me what happen last night,
and i know i can't lie to you.

i told you the truth,
and you didn't say a word.

i put you down
and you hug me tight.

all i did was hug you tight,
and whisper "i'm sorry"

i kissed you,
and you know what i meant.

when you cry,
i feel so helpless.

girl,it will not happen again.

even though i have not say that 3 words to you,
but you know i'm serious about you.

the game of betrayal.

k box is high.
tequila make us even higher.

the smile on her face,
make us high to the top.

i shall play a game.
the game of betrayal.






i'm so gonna see you soon babe.

just you..

walk away from our friends.
sat at somewhere quiet.

i lie down to look at the stars,
you did the same thing too.

you move closer to me,
and whisper in my ear.

you say you want to be mine.
but i just smile at you.

just when you was about to turn away,
i kiss you on the lips.

you know what i meant.
and you kiss me back.

the night is meant for us.

the night is cooling,
the wind is blowing.

i can hear you breathing,
when you lean against me.

your scent still linger on my clothes.
the sweetness of your kiss is still on my lips.

the night is ours.
till the dawn breaks.

Lips struck..

pool was not so great today.
what happen later was hot.



a peck on the cheek makes a different.
but a kiss on the lips makes a whole new story.



i'm missing you.

girl,you're hot the way you lie on me..


work the whole day
met up for a drink
chilling winds, warm company

one thing i can say,
thats fucking hot.


gonna get to bed soon,
was hell of a night

to surrender my soul for you,
i will.
to give up my life for you,
i will.
to give up everything,
just to give you happiness,
i will.
if it pays a price to be with you,
i will pay no matter what it is.

the first time i see you,
i knew you are the one.
you took away my breathe without noticing it.
i couldn't take my eyes off you,
cuz i'm afraid i won't be able to see you anymore.
the second time i see you,
you took away my heart.
even though you never notice it,
but i know i'm in love with you.

everything just happen so fast,
till i lost myself.
i know chances are very low for me,
but i don't care.
i'll do anything just to be by your side.





the furthest distance in the universe,is not from earth to the moon.
it's i'm right beside you,and you don't know i love you.

well,it's valentine's day.
morning went to school,but went off during lunch time.
meet gab they all around 3.
play pool after eating lunch.
5 plus went to see aaron they all jam.
leave around 8 plus.
called jaz to see if she meeting me or nt.
ya,we meet up.
called for pizza delivery to her house there.
i reach her place there around 10 plus.
just nice the pizza come not long after.
went to a underblock playground to eat.
it's my first time spending valentine's day this way.
but it's nice and romantic.
sit there chill and chit chat.
even though we never go to some crowded place to celebrate,
no roses and expensive gifts.
but i like just spending time with her like this.
just me and her.(i think too much ya)
anyway,walk her up to her house at 1.
home sweet home after that.



i know there's someone who likes you.
maybe even more than me.
maybe you like her too.
and i know i can't be compared to her.
maybe she's far better than me.
and she's the type you like.
but do you know i like you?
i know i'm not the type you like.
and maybe you treat me just like how you treat your friends.
but then,i wanted something more between us.
well,do i stand a chance?
i wonder.

one step at a time.like my friends say.
don't rush it.
i will wait.
till you accept me or go with her.







i want to be yours.

pool,smoke,drink coffee and slack and talk cock is my life now.
time spend with my friends let me forget you for a moment.
so i won't miss you so much.

meet gab they all to slack today.pool again.i'm fucking gonna get my pool skill right.
went home around 11.

tomorrow is valentine's day.will be meeting someone.might be meeting nika and ben first to chill.just hope no last min changes.if not i'm gonna call gab they all and
go kbox to emo myself to death.haha.

wonder what will tomorrow be like.






i simply don't know why i miss you.

i find no reason to emo bout you.

went out with some friends.
at 9 plus 10 like that go hougang play pool.
with the help of friends,i slightly improve a little bit.
went home after that.
during the whole meeting with them i'm damn emo.
but when i see a hot babe playing pool next to our table,
emo thing went off for a moment.
but come back after we left.


seriously,i couldn't find any reason to emo bout her.
but i just emo for her.
shit me man.
i need drugs,
i need drinks,
i need pain,
to keep me from thinking about her.


we apparently are from different world.
our heartbeat beats at different pace.
but still,i'm attracted to her.
what the hell is wrong with me.
why am i worried about her?
why am i thinking about her?
get her out of my mind.
she might never be mine.

i guess this valentine day,
i'll be spending alone.





wayne is fucking emo and fucking in a mess now.

how did i fall in love

Remember when, we never needed each other
The best of friends like sister and brother
We understood we'd never be alone

Those days are gone, now I want you so much
The night is long and I need your touch
Don't know what to say
Never meant to feel this way
Don't wanna be alone tonight

What can I do to make you mine?
Fallen so hard, so fast this time
What did I say, what did you do?
How did I fall in love with you?

I hear your voice and I start to tremble
Brings back the child that I resemble
I cannot pretend that we can still be friends
Don't wanna be alone tonight

Ooh I wanna say this right
And it has to be tonight
Just need you to know
I don't wanna live this life
I don't wanna say goodbye
With you I wanna spend the rest of my life

What can I do to make you mine?
Fallen so hard, so fast this time
Everything's changed, we never knew
How did I fall in love with you?

Mr brightside by the killers


Coming out of my cage 
And I've been doin' just fine 
Gotta gotta be down 
Because I want it all 
It started out with a kiss 
How did it end up like this? 
It was only a kiss 
It was only a kiss 

Now I'm falling asleep 
And she's calling a cab 
While he's having a smoke 
And she's taking a drag 

Now they're going to bed 
And my stomach is sick 
And it's all in my head 
But she's touching his chest now 
He takes off her dress now 
Let me go 

And I just can't look 
It's killing me 
And taking control 

Jealousy 
Turning saints into the sea 
Swimming through sick lullabies 
Choking on your alibis 
But it's just the price I pay 
Destiny is calling me 
Open up my eager eyes 
'Cause I'm Mr. Brightside 

I'm coming out of my cage 
And I've been doin' just fine 
Gotta gotta be down 
Because I want it all 
It started out with a kiss 
How did it end up like this? 
It was only a kiss 
It was only a kiss 

Now I'm falling asleep 
And she's calling a cab 
While he's having a smoke 
And she's taking a drag 

Now they're going to bed 
And my stomach is sick 
And it's all in my head 
But she's touching his chest now 
He takes off her dress now 
Let me go 

'Cause I just can't look 
It's killing me 
And taking control 

Jealousy 
Turning saints into the sea 
Swimming through sick lullabies 
Choking on your alibis 
But it's just the price I pay 
Destiny is calling me 
Open up my eager eyes 
'Cause I'm Mr. Brightside 

I never 
I never 
I never 
I never






i'm feel not ok...

maybe...

i don't know why i will feel this way?
it is that i like you?
i have no idea.
it's been awhile that i wanted to be serious.
this time i know i will.
but is everything true?
like my friends say,don't put too much hope.
it might not turn out the way you want it to be.
after what have happen to me that night,
i'm worried bout you.
i want you to be safe and sound.
things might not happen to me,
it might be the love ones around me.
you are the one i'm most worried about.
am i treating you more then a friend?
will you keep a distance away from me,
when you know i like you?
if yes,
i will keep all my feelings away,
i will never let it show.
all i want is to be able to be at your side.
even as a friend,i don't mind.
so are we just friends or what?




i think i really like you.do you feel the same as i do?

woke up at 11 plus by anto.asking me wanna slack not.so went to meet him downstair at 12 plus.slack till 2 plus then go home.while on my way up to my floor,i see something that i shouldn't be seeing.it scare the freak out of me.i shouldn't have play last night.call anto at 4 plus.tell him i want to go church with him.cuz i feel unsafe.so meet him 5 plus and headed for church.feel abit better after the mask.went to hougang mall with him and aaron.went to the spec shop to accompany anto check his eyes.and i got myself a pair of contact lens.went home after that.meet up with anto and gabriel for coffee at 9 plus.slack,smoke and talk cock as usual.11 plus accompany gabriel walk home and we took bus home.


valentine day is coming and i have no date.sian.anyone want ask me out that day?haha.i know there wont be.just waiting for someone answer.hopefully is the answer i want to hear.if not i will be spending valentine day alone.sad.



that's all for the night.





i just don't want things to happen to you.

i believe

i believe in god now and things that are unseen.don't ask me why,i will tell when the time is ripe.i just believe it.i promise i will go to church and temple when i'm free.i promise.


8th feb 2008.

second day of cyn.went to my uncle place today.stay for awhile and headed to my auntie place to chill.catch up with my cousins.talk quite alot.even though we don't meet often.maybe once a year.but we are still very close.play card and i won some cash.haha.after that went for a movie.my cousin treat.after that we went home.that is the first time we ever have cousins outing.it's fun to click with your cousins.do meet up soon and have fun.haha.

9th feb 2008.

my ah yi and cousin ah li jie,they all come to my house to bai nian.very long never see them le.but still,they do dote on me as before.play with my younger cousins and nieces.around 6 plus,my another cousin,ah bee jie came with her son.play with him too.he share the same name as me.wayne.haha.7 plus,ah li jie going off.her daughter don't want to go home.they say want to stay for the night,cuz they want to be with me.haha.i'm good with kids.haha.but stil they have to go home.when they reach home,she called.saying her daughter crying,cuz they want me.i talk to my niece,asking her not to cry and promise her i will bring her out soon.around 9 plus,ah bee jie went home.
meet anto and gabriel at 11 plus to chill.something happen to us and we got freak out.hang out till 4 plus we went home.cuz it's the safest time.



that's all for today.




don't know why,i miss you.

when is the last time you say i love you to someone you really care for?
when is the last time you tell yourself,"hey life is short,i need to treasure it."
when is the last time you had a heart to heart talk with your closest friend?
when is the last time you cry your heart out?

do you feel that life is short?
i do.
i use to think that i can live for very long time.
but i was wrong.
i can never live for as long as i want.
time is not enough for me.
but still i have things yet to finish.
i have not tell my parents that i actually do love them,
but i just don't know how to express it out in a nicer way.
i haven't told my brother,
actually i do care for him.
i haven told my grandma,
actually i wanted so much to sit down and talk to her.
i haven't told my friends,
how thankful i am to know them,
and how they have make my life a better one.
i haven't told my exs that i'm glad to know them once,
fall in love and get my heartbreak,
and leave a memory that no one else can replace.
i haven't told the one i like now,
that i love her and want to be with her.
i have lots of things undone.
but i wonder do i have enough time to do everything
before i die?

if i die now,
i will have lots of regrets.
the biggest regrets will be the promise to my godma that pass away.
i will never be able to do what i promise.
cuz i'm no longer the little girl in her eyes.
i've changed.
but mama,if you can ever hear me,
i will tell you i love you.
cuz i never get a chance to do so.
sorry that i say that so late.

do what you want to do.
don't be like me.
leaving things undone.
i might be gone soon.
no one know.
i will start doing what i want to now.
in case i have more regrets.

live life to the fullest.

yesterday.

forgot to write about yesterday.
yesterday went for dinner at my grandma place.after that meet jas for a movie.went to marina square to watch sweeny todd.before the movie,play pool.and i suck in it.after that movie time.not a bad movie.i like the way he slit people throat and the blood just splash out.just think of it,make me got the feeling to kill.haha..after the movie,went to merlion park there to sit and chat.had a heart to heart talk with her.through the conversation,i realise she's not as wild as people think.she got that serious side of her too.but many just overlook it.there are more about her that i yet to find out.i want to know more about her,but provided she want to let me know more. . after the long chat,send her home,and i headed for home.
i have a great night with her.i bet i will never forget it.




wo xi huan ni.

first day of cny.as usual,i got questioned by all my relatives.asking why no boyfriend,why dress like boy.all i do i is just smile at them.idiot relative.this year,is kinda bored.wo yue lai yue bu xi huan cny.i don't know why.
did catch up with my closer cousins.cuz they are the ones that knows more about me.
one day just ended in a boring way.sian.


these few days,there's one person in my mind.kept thinking bout her and i don't know why.
i like her company.and wanna know more about her.does she feel the way i do.i wonder....

Baby, I just don't get it
Do you enjoy being hurt?
I know you smell the perfume,
the make up on his shirt
You don't believe his stories
You know that they're all lies
Bad as you are, you stick around
And I just don't know why

If I was your man, baby you'd
Never worry 'bout, what I'd do
I'd be coming home, back to you
Every night, doin' you right
You're the type of woman, deserves good things
Fist full of diamonds, hand full of rings
Baby, you're a star
I just wanna show you, you are

You should let me love you
Let me be the one to
Give you everything you want and need
Baby, good love and protection
Make me your selection
Show you the way love's supposed to be
Baby, you should let me love you, love you, love you
Love you, yeah

Listen,
Your true beauty's description looks so good that it hurts
You're a dime plus ninety-nine and it's a shame
Don't even know what you're worth
Everywhere you go they stop and stare
Cause you're bad and it shows
From your head to your toes
Out of control, baby you know

If I was your man, baby you'd
Never worry 'bout, what I'd do
I'd be coming home, back to you
Every night, doin' you right
You're the type of woman, deserves good things
Fist full of diamonds, hand full of rings
Baby, you're a star
I just wanna show you, you are

You should let me love you
Let me be the one to
Give you everything you want and need
Oh baby, good love and protection
Make me your selection
Show you the way love's supposed to be
Baby, you should let me..

You deserve better, girl
You know you deserve better
We should be together, girl (baby)
With me and you it's whatever, girl (hey!)
So can we make this thing ours?

You should let me love you
Let me be the one to
Give you everything you want and need
Good love and protection
Make me your selection
Show you the way love's supposed to be
Baby, you should let me love you
Let me be the one to
Give you everything you want and need
Good love and protection
Make me your selection
Show you the way love's supposed to be
You should let me love you
Let me be the one to
Give you everything you want and need
Good love and protection
Make me your selection
Show you the way love's supposed to be
Yeah, let me love you 
That's all you need baby

make me your selection,will you?

for you...

想起你的笑
我孤单的嘴角
也不自觉扬起像羽毛
当你牵著我的手
我的心偷偷的颤抖
当你伸出双手
就能够温暖我被冻僵的每根指头
忘了心多痛
眼泪曾有多重
有了你就不再作梦
一千零一夜
传说的星空
这个故事没有
唱完的时候
春夏秋冬只要和你一起走
每一个镜头都是真的感动

有一些声音
回荡在脑海中
凌乱原本该有的执著
害怕爱瞬间流走
这样的念头我不想说
当你伸出双手
就能够温暖我被冻僵的每根指头
忘了心多痛
眼泪曾有多重
有了你就不再作梦
一千零一夜
传说的星空
这个故事没有
唱完的时候
春夏秋冬只要和你一起走
每一个镜头都是真的感动

没有什黱需要挽留
什黱能被错过
已经拥有太多
一千零一夜
一千零一夜
一千零一夜
一千零一夜
不灭的星空
一千零一夜
传说的星空
一千零一夜
唱完的时候
春夏秋冬只要和你一起走
每一个镜头都是真的感动